A Million Dirty Secrets by C.L. Parker

Title: A Million Dirty Secrets
Author: C.L. Parker
Pages: 368
Publication Date:August 27, 2013
Publisher: Bantam

**ARC provided by Netgalley in exchange for an honest review**

The Basic Summary: In order to save her mother's life, Delanie Talbot sells herself into sexual slavery. Enter her owner for the next 2 year, Noah Crawford. What follows is a journey of self-discovery for both Lanie and Noah, and the chance of unexpected love.

My Review: Reading this book was like watching a horrific train wreck happen. You're sitting there, jaw dropped in a horrible sort of fascination, and you know that you should look away, but you can't. So instead, you watch the train wreck happen because you can't not look. The first page of this book was filled with slut-shaming, which is when I knew that I should really put down this book and walk away. Some of you may not know this, but in addition to my shallow cover hoarding, I also lack self-control and a sense of self-preservation. I know something is bad, and I know that I should stop, but I can't help myself. One part of me is sitting there going "Hah, Ade you are such a wuss. Yea you wuss! You're going to put down this book aren't you? Why? Because YOU CAN'T TAKE IT!" Another part of me is like "Bring it, bitch! I am going to kick your ass!" and the last part of me is like "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO DOING!? STOP IT!" I rarely listen to the 3rd part of me. What was the point of that? To let you know what goes on in my head when I don't DNF a book that I really should DNF.

Let's start with Lanie. Lanie is an idiot. There's no getting around it. She's just stupid. We're supposed to believe that she's a mature 24 year old, but she's not. The book immediately starts off with Lanie slut-shaming other women, and just gets worse from there. She uses phrases like "moo juice" "coco yumminess" "eager beaver" and "googly moogly" on a regular basis. She even refers to her vagina as "Double Agent Coochie" and to Noah's penis as "Wonder Peen." How many 24 year olds do you know that act like that? Personally, I know none. Lanie selling her body was supposed to make us feel sympathetic towards her, but it didn't really work out that way. At first it was *a little* sad, but the sympathy quickly ran out becuase she acts like an idiot. I know we were supposed to like her, but between the slut-shaming, the weird thoughts she had regarding Noel and sex, and all of the phrases she used, she was just incredibly unlikeable.

Noah was.. he was a misogynistic douche schnozzle. He thinks with his penis, and that's about it. Occasionally he'll remember that there's another head that he can think with, but any thoughts that came from the brain in his other head were quickly brushed aside by the head in his pants. If I'm being completely honest,Noah's character was.. bland. His only defining characteristic was that he was  jerk. Oh, and can I just say that it's annoying that he somehow had the time to gain the skill level of a concert pianist? From what Noah said in the book, he was too busy drinking and fucking up when he was young to do anything else. There was no mention of him playing piano, or any other instrument, until Lanie discovered he had a music room and he proceeded to woo her with his piano skills. At least FSoG provided a bit of a back story regarding the piano. This book just threw it in there with no warning.

The sex scenes were awful. There's no nice way to say it. They were weird and awkward, and half of the "sexy" things they did weren't actually sexy. It got to the point where I just started skimming the sex scenes because they were so bad.

My Overall Opinion: I honestly thought this book was horrible, but maybe that's just me. The characters weren't likeable, the story sucked, and the sex scenes read like they were written by a honry 15 year old boy. I personally think that the book was just bad all around, but y'all can read it and find out for yourselves.

Sweet Peril by Wendy Higgins

Title: Sweet Peril (The Sweet Trilogy, #2)

Author: Wendy Higgins

Pages: 371

Publication Date: April 30th, 2013

Publisher: HarperTeen

The Basic Summary: Anna White used to be your typical good girl. Now? Not so much. After finding out that her father, Belial, is a demon, everything she thought she knew about herself and the world has changed. In order to keep herself safe, Anna must carry out her father's work - mainly tempting others into sin by getting them to drink. Anna, however, is different from the other Nephilim. How? She's prophesied to be the girl saves the world, and defeats the demons. Join Anna, Belial, and old and new friends as they continue on their quest to save the world.

My Review: I can't tell if the writing got worse, or if I've just gotten more critical of the books I read. Either way, this book was just kind of.. Average. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't anything that would stick out in my mind. I'm writing this review a day after I finished reading this book, and I'm already starting to forget what happened. There were a few spots that had some very unexciting action, but mainly this book was about Anna and Kaidan denying their love for each other until they finally suck it the hell up and work things out. I honestly don't have much to say about this one because it was boring. I was so disappointed after reading this because it just didn't live up to the amazingness that was Sweet Evil. The entire book basically went:

Anna parties with people
Anna feels guilty about partying with people
Belial sends Anna and Kope to go recruit Nephs for their cause
Anna pines after Kaidan
Kaidan tells Anna to screw off
Anna does something that Kaidan finds offensive. Awkwardness follows.
Anna continues to pine after Kaidan
Anna visits Kaidan
Anna and Kaidan pine after each other not so secretly
*spoilery stuff that I won't share. Read the book ;D*
Kope and Kaidan go on a mission
*lots and lots of drama. This scene actually made me sad. When it happened, I was just like "NO BABY COME BACK! LET ME LOVE YOU!"
HAPPILY EVER AFTER! Sort of.

So basically it's kind of like Sweet Evil but watered down and not as exciting. I think that I built this book up in my head, and by the time I finally got the book, I had it on such a high pedestal that there was no possible way that this book wouldn't disappoint me. While I think this book was boring, I do take full responsibility for my part in the disappointment. Either way, read it and tell me what y'all think about it.

My Overall Opinion: I didn't hate this book, but I didn't love it either. It was just a meh for me. Even then, I'd still recommend the book to anyone who asks for an angel story that doesn't read like a bad Stephenie Meyer novel *AHEM* FALLEN was that mean? That was mean. At least the concept of the book is original, and the writing is eloquent enough that it can keep you interested.

The Diviners by Libba Bray

Title: The Diviners

Author: Libba Bray

Pages: 578

Publication Date: September 18, 2012

Publisher: Little, Brown Books

The Basic Summary: The year is 1926 and Evie O'Neill is dying to escape her boring life in Zenith, Ohio. After an itsy bitsy psychic reading incident, she finally gets her wish. When Evie is sent to go live with her uncle in the New York City, and she knows that everything is about to change, and she's thrilled. Well... up until the murders start. Follow Evie, Uncle Will, and Jericho as they work to catch the murderer before it's too late. Dun dun DUUUUUUN I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself!

My Review: Oh god. I hated this book so much. I tried so hard to love this book, but I just couldn't force myself to do it. It wasn't that the writing was bad, because it wasn't. In fact, it was amazing. I love the world the Libbra Bray created, and I think that she's incredibly talented, but this book just did not do it for me. My main issue with this book revolves around Evie (this in itself was problematic because, well, Evie is the main character, meaning that there is no way to escape her stupidity). I kept hoping that at some point Evie would mature and stop being such a selfish cow, but that never really happened. It's like she didn't understand that her selfish actions could hurt other people, so when she would go out and do stupid reckless shit, or lie to people, she was only thinking about how it could help her. It's like she had a death wish throughout the entire book, and every time someone told her not to do something because it would put her and her whichever one of her poor friends that she tricked into following her in danger, she'd do it anyway. I understand being a reckless teen. Really, I do. I've done some incredibly stupid things like jumping out of a moving car that I regret sort of a lot, but nothing I've done is anywhere near as stupid as the things Evie would do. Unlike most people, Evie didn't learn from her mistakes. She would do something incredibly stupid, get reprimanded, and then go out and do another stupid thing just for kicks. She had no boundaries, no common sense, and no sense of self preservation. Basically, she was just incredibly stupid. I honestly think that if the main character had been Theta, Jericho, Uncle Will, or basically anyone other than Evie, I would have adored this book. But it wasn't, and I didn't. I honestly wish that I  hadn't spent my money on this book, and I really don't want to read the next one in the series. I love Libba Bray, and I normally love her books, but this one did not do it for me. Just goes to show that it only takes one thing to ruin what could be a great book.

My Overall Opinion: If I completely forget about Evie and all of her stupidity, this book is amazing. The world building was amazing, and Bray used slang that was relevant at the time, which in turn made the book even more amazing. Unfortunately, Evie was in the book, and she ruined it for me. If you're able to look past a character doing incredibly stupid things throughout the entire story, then read this book. I really wanted to love it, but I just couldn't get past how obnoxious Evie was.

Unleashed by Nancy Holder

Title: Unleashed

Author: Nancy Holder

Pages: 382

Publication Date: November 22, 2011

Publisher: Delacorte Books

The Basic Summary: After the death of Katelyn McBride's mother, Katelyn goes to live with her Grandfather in Arkansas where she quickly realizes that something is amiss in the small town of Wolf Springs. As Katelyn tries to adjust to a new life in a strange place, she must also discover the secrets that the town is hiding.

My Review: Have any of you ever had that moment where you start a book with hope that it might be a good book, only to have those hopes bludgeoned over the head with a two by four? Yes? Then you probably know how I feel. I wasn't expecting a masterpiece, but I was expecting something entertaining, and this book failed to deliver. I'm sure you can all guess what the book is about just from looking at the cover (isn't the cover gorgeous?). If not, then I'll help you out and tell you. It's about werewolves, and this is one of the major things that pissed me the heck off. Any person with a brain in their head would know what the secret of Wolf Springs is. Seriously. It's even in the name of the town. Did Katelyn know this though? Nope. When she saw and heard werewolves, she just kinda went "Eh. Big dogs!" or she'd assume that the howling was from a group camping in the woods trying to release their inner wolves yes, it was as stupid as it sounds. No one is that stupid. I don't care who you are, where you're from, or what you do. It is not possible to be as stupid as Holder made Katelyn. We start the novel off with Katelyn watching her mother die. Sad, right? Yea, no. Holder does this thing where instead of showing you and letting you  come to your own conclusions, she just kind of.. tells you. I didn't feel particularly sad about her mother dying because the scene wasn't written in a way that would make the reader feel any kind of sympathy. After her mother dies, Katelyn goes off to live with her Grandfather, and things just go downhill from there. While in Wolf Springs, Katelyn makes a new friend named Cordelia who happens to have a crazy family. I know what you're thinking, they can't be that bad, right? Wrong. The first thing one of Cordelia's sisters said to Katelyn? "It looks like a stranger." The first thing the other sister said? "Smells like a stranger," all of this while circling around Katelyn like predators. Any normal person would have hightailed it out of there, but since Katelyn is an idiot, she just kind of stayed. Cordelia's dad is crazy as well, but he's more of a sneak-up-behind-you-and-stab-you-in-the-back crazy than a run-towards-you-with-an-ax-screaming-like-a-banshee crazy like Cordelia's sisters. They're all crazy, just different brands. I think my biggest issue with this book was that you never really saw Katelyn grow as a person. We get told that she's grown, but you never really witness it. Katelyn says stupid things, lies, and makes incredibly stupid mistakes throughout the book, but she doesn't ever learn any lessons. Everyone just forgives her for her screw-up and she moves on to something new. Basically, nothing in this book was believable. If I read a book, I want to be able to see character development. I want to see the character realize that his/her actions are stupid, and I want to see that character evolve. I don't want to read a bok about a character that refuses to take responsibility for their actions, and I don't want to be told that the character has grown as a person when it's clear that the character has not grown.

My Overall Opinion: I know it doesn't seem like it in this review, but I hated this book with  fiery burning passion. If you're looking for a good book, I'd suggest looking elsewhere. If you're looking for fluff that you don't have to think about, this book is perfect for you.

Sweet Evil by Wendy Higgins

Title: Sweet Evil
Author: Wendy Higgins
Pages: 454
Publication Date: May 1st, 2012
Publisher: HarperTeen

The Basic Summary: Anna Whitt is your typical good girl. You know, the one who calls her adoptive mom to let her know she's safe, the one who turns in her homework on time, every day. She's the girl who Just Says No to drugs, an it's a good thing she does, because her well being, and the well being of the ones she loves depends on it. Anna has always known that she's, shall we say, different from everyone else. She can see the "colors" of everyone she meets, a secret she reveals to no one. When Anna meets Kaidan Rowe, everything she thought she knew about herself, and the world changes, and she's left struggling to keep the ones she loves safe.

My Review: I actually enjoyed this book a lot. Lately, I've been reading a lot of fallen angel books, and this one is by far the best I've encountered. At first, i wasn't particularly fond of Anna, she was just too.. Good. But as I continued reading, she evolved as a character, and by the end I was rooting for a happy ending. Basically, Anna encounters Kaidan ("Kai, like Thai, but yummier." Anna's words, not mine) while at a concert with her best friend, and she's immediately drawn to him. As the relationship develops between the two, Anna learns about a whole world she never knew existed, and is introduced to a life she neither wanted, or is prepared for. While there were parts where Anna was naive to the point of stupidity, she was an overall likable character, as was Kaidan. Kaidan is the bad boy of the book. As the son of the Baron of Lust (oh yes, they're not called demons in this book, the head honchos are called Barons of whatever particular sin they're supposed to tempt people to), his job is to tempt unwitting teen girls into his bed. At first, Kaidan enjoyed his role, and he excelled at it; but once he met Anna, all of that changed. This is actually one of the few things that annoyed me about the book- it's completely unrealistic that he'd sudden have a change of heart so quickly after meeting Anna. I wish that Higgins had given it more transition time instead of having Kaidan meet Anna and about a week later, suddenly having a change of heart about what he does.


My Overall Opinion: I really enjoyed this book overall, and I would definitely recommend it to anyone who asked.